Toxic Stray or Finding Balance

Last night I had four beers. I hadn't meant to. I was handed one on the bus ride back from Moshi. The ride from Moshi to Arusha takes about an hour and a half, so I got a second beer from the school stocked cooler. Two beers was plenty, but when I sat down to visit some friends and was offered another...I felt obligated. Finally, getting home my landlord was waiting for me...of course he really wanted to go out for a beer. Anyhow, I had four beers and four beers was plenty.

This morning I am dragging. I do not drink often. I'd say I average once every other week or less. It is something I can live with or without. My family history of alcoholism is always at the front of my mind. I don't like to feel off balance.

Spiritually, I envision a path going directly to the light. When I'm off balance, I am straying from the path. Sometimes it is my ego, sometimes it is a need not getting met, sometimes it is too much food, sometimes it is too much to drink, I make bad choices--what is key is it puts me off balance.

I am starting to understand toxins this way. A toxin is something which puts our life off balance. It is possible to have life off balance physically, spiritually, or mentally. Bringing our life into balance and keeping it there, is our challenge. I am trying.

Sometimes it takes sitting in quiet to find clarity. I will take some quiet this weekend. I will focus on balance and build upon what I know.